Return

I'm struggling, really am. It just isn't coming right, it isn't coming at all. I could blame the sleep, the laziness, et al. It really isn't any of those things, it's just me and all that I didn't put in before. I remember the times I was ahead of the pack. It all came so naturally, I never needed to worry about it. I did it because I could, not because I should. Loved those simplistic times, when it all made sense, when it was tough to disappoint. Too many distractions now, too much reverie to keep me away.

So I made the decision. I'm going back to where I started. I want to rectify those mistakes, and see where I was really meant to go. It is a dangerous experiment, but a fulfilling and necessary one right now. Life is about keeping things exciting; this is the dynamism we all talk about but don't know about. Remember, change is not to be feared, no matter what we are told. I don't know where to start, it's all so hazy. The structure, the method, the involvement has all left me, and who knows how hard it will be to court them again? All I know is I'm ready, I'm ready to roll up the sleeves and get to work. Today I struggle, tommorrow I shall not!

Welcome to the ride.